Now That The Writer’s Strike Is Over, I Can Wel­come Back My Imag­i­nary Writ­ers

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Now That The Writer’s Strike Is Over, I Can Welcome Back My Imaginary Writers

Before I begin today’s show, I would just like to con­grat­u­late the Writ­ers Guild of Amer­i­ca for secur­ing an excel­lent new con­tract. Now that the writ­ers’ strike is over, I’d like to wel­come my imag­i­nary team of imag­i­nary writ­ers back to my imag­i­nary writ­ers’ room. To be hon­est, with­out my writ­ers, I’ve felt as flat and unin­spired as Stephen Col­bert with his writ­ers. So I’d also like to con­grat­u­late Stephen on hav­ing his 19 real writ­ers back so they can come up with such wild and orig­i­nal ideas as com­par­ing Don­ald Trump to Hitler and her­pes, because if that’s not com­e­dy, then come …