‘Got To Be Kid­ding’: Kim­mel and Col­bert Dis­miss Hunter Par­don Crit­i­cisms

CBS’s host of The Late Show, Stephen Col­bert, and ABC’s Jim­my Kim­mel were dis­pleased on their Tues­day shows that some peo­ple are still crit­i­ciz­ing Pres­i­dent Joe Biden for par­don­ing his son, Hunter. For both men, the re-elec­tion of Don­ald Trump makes such crit­i­cisms moot.

For his part, Col­bert focused on the intra-par­ty squab­bles, “Now, some of Joe’s fel­low Democ­rats are also a lit­tle upset. Col­orado Sen­a­tor Michael Ben­net tweet­ed, ‘Pres­i­dent Biden’s deci­sion to put per­son­al inter­est ahead of duty and fur­ther erodes Amer­i­cans’ faith that the jus­tice sys­tem is fair and equal for all.’”

Col­bert was unmoved, “Okay, not sure how much inter­est Amer­i­cans have in the idea of jus­tice right now. After all, we had an elec­tion, and we did just re-elect a guy whose slo­gan was ‘Like my crime? Then hit me, baby, one more time.’”

Speak­ing of Col­orado, Gov. Jared Polis was next to face Colbert’s ridicule, “Demo­c­ra­t­ic Gov­er­nor Jared Polis said that Pres­i­dent Biden has a big­ger fam­i­ly to think about, because “When you become pres­i­dent, your role is Pater famil­ias of the nation.” Yes, the pres­i­dent is the nation’s dad. We all remem­ber FDR’s immor­tal words.”

Col­bert then played a spoof of Roosevelt’s “Day of Infamy” speech with the fake FDR declar­ing, “Decem­ber 7th, 1941, a date which you promised to shov­el the walk! Do it quick, and I won’t tell your moth­er, who’s also my cousin. Weird time to tell you, but there you go.”

Mean­while, over at ABC, Kim­mel focused on the GOP response, “Back home in Wash­ing­ton, Repub­li­cans are absolute­ly explod­ing with pre­tend out­rage after Pres­i­dent Biden par­doned his son, Hunter. One of those who expressed right­eous indig­na­tion is Sen­a­tor John Cornyn of Texas, who warned us of the long-term per­ils asso­ci­at­ed with a sit­u­a­tion like this.”

In a clip, Cornyn pro­claimed, “It’s a ter­ri­ble exam­ple. Because with­out any account­abil­i­ty for peo­ple break­ing the law, get­ting a pass, in oth­er words, there is no deter­rent effect or no account­abil­i­ty that teach­es our young peo­ple and oth­ers that, yes, you need to fol­low the law. And yes, there are con­se­quences if you don’t.”

The CSPAN clip was then edit­ed to show footage of an audi­ence laugh­ing at Cornyn. For his part, Kim­mel, clear­ly allud­ing to Trump, respond­ed, “And you know what? Peo­ple say politi­cians have no sense of humor. These guys have seri­ous­ly got to be kid­ding with this. I don’t think I can take it—they do it with a straight face over and over again.”

What Col­bert and Kim­mel don’t get is that the Hunter par­don is not an attempt by Biden to apply Trumpian stan­dards to his son, but the con­tin­u­a­tion of a swampy tra­di­tion that pre­dates Trump, which makes all the Trump crit­i­cism look like a one-sided pow­er play.

Here are tran­scripts for the Decem­ber 3 shows:

CBS The Late Show with Stephen Col­bert

12/3/2024

11:38 PM ET

STEPHEN COLBERT: Now, some of Joe’s fel­low Democ­rats are also a lit­tle upset. Col­orado Sen­a­tor Michael Ben­net tweet­ed, “Pres­i­dent Biden’s deci­sion to put per­son­al inter­est ahead of duty and fur­ther erodes Amer­i­cans’ faith that the jus­tice sys­tem is fair and equal for all.” 

Okay, not sure how much inter­est Amer­i­cans have in the idea of jus­tice right now. After all, we had an elec­tion, and we did just re-elect a guy whose slo­gan was “Like my crime? Then hit me, baby, one more time.” 

Now, come in close, come in close, I can’t do it yet. I can’t bring myself to do it. Demo­c­ra­t­ic Gov­er­nor Jared Polis said that Pres­i­dent Biden has a big­ger fam­i­ly to think about, because “When you become pres­i­dent, your role is Pater famil­ias of the nation.” Yes, the pres­i­dent is the nation’s dad. We all remem­ber FDR’s immor­tal words.

FAKE FRANKLIN ROOSEVELT: Decem­ber 7th, 1941, a date which you promised to shov­el the walk! Do it quick, and I won’t tell your moth­er, who’s also my cousin. Weird time to tell you, but there you go.

COLBERT: Just– it was a weird time for him to bring that up.

***

ABC Jim­my Kim­mel Live!

12/3/2024

11:42 PM ET

JIMMY KIMMEL: Mean­while, back home in Wash­ing­ton, Repub­li­cans are absolute­ly explod­ing with pre­tend out­rage after Pres­i­dent Biden par­doned his son, Hunter. One of those who expressed right­eous indig­na­tion is Sen­a­tor John Cornyn of Texas, who warned us of the long-term per­ils asso­ci­at­ed with a sit­u­a­tion like this.

JOHN CORNYN: It’s a ter­ri­ble exam­ple. Because with­out any account­abil­i­ty for peo­ple break­ing the law, get­ting a pass, in oth­er words, there is no deter­rent effect or no account­abil­i­ty that teach­es our young peo­ple and oth­ers that, yes, you need to fol­low the law. And yes, there are con­se­quences if you don’t. 

KIMMEL: And you know what? Peo­ple say politi­cians have no sense of humor. These guys have seri­ous­ly got to be kid­ding with this. I don’t think I can take—they do it with a straight face over and over again.